Today, I made a delivery to an office in north Arlington (VA). The item happened to be a blue truck with flowers. It wasn't a subpoena or any other legal document. I didn't feel obliged to be grim and terse. In fact I decided to be a bit flippant, composing a fictional origin for the sender of the item I carried.
My destination was a business that styled itself "Imagine Schools" (or some such). I took an elevator to the appropriate floor and entered the office of Imagine Schools.
"Here is a gift from Yoko Ono and the spirit of John Lennon," I announced to the young woman at the front desk. As she looked at me with a deadpan expression, saying nothing, I further ventured, "It is intended for L--- E---. Does that ring any bells?" She replied, "Yes."
I had her sign for the gift as a proof of delivery and left. As I waited for the elevator, I saw her walking from her front desk area, holding the blue truck bearing flowers.
Later, I was to learn that she had emailed the source of the blue truck with flowers to complain that she had suffered a racist remark from the delivery man who, she alleged, called her "Yoko Ono."
I assured the source that that was not the case, accurately repeating the expression I had used to humorously preface my delivery.
I explained to the source that "Imagine" is the title of a song by a famous singer, John Lennon. His wife and soul-mate was Yoko Ono. They had declared that they were two bodies with one soul. They were really tight.
Hence, I thought that a business that styled itself "Imagine Schools" might find some humor in my referencing Yoko Ono and the spirit of John Lennon (he's deceased now). For all I knew, the business title may have been a homage to Lennon's famous song. No way Jose! (Oooopps!)
The woman manning the front desk was deeply offended and down right pissed. Hence, her email to my business associate who was the source of the gift.
Incidentally, guess what this woman's last name was? Sing! I kid you not.
